Divorce is difficult for everyone in the family, and handling the emotional well-being of your children is important during the fallout. Divorce is never a happy time, especially if you have kids.
It’s important that you do some research to prepare yourself for the challenge of co-parenting after the legal side of divorce is over. If you want your children to have the best shot at a smooth readjustment, you’ll put forth the effort to create a safe and loving co-parenting plan with your ex-partner.
Of course, there are those times when it’s not “safe” to create a co-parenting situation. Let us imagine the situation is somewhat amicable, and there are no immediate dangers present. Here are some tips that will help you through the process of co-parenting after a divorce.
Acknowledge your kids’ concerns
You may face times when your kid is adamant about not wanting to go visit their other parent. When this happens, it’s important to acknowledge and address your kid’s concerns.
Try asking your child if you can do something to make the situation better. It may be as simple as the kid doesn’t have their favorite toy at daddy’s/mommy’s house. There’s always a reason behind your child acting this way, so don’t simply brush off their concerns.
Remember to make your time spent quality
Remember that divorce doesn’t mean your relationship with your kids has to change. You can still spend quality time with the kids, even if you end with 50/50 custody. Take the opportunity to do little things to get more time with your babies.
For instance, take the time to pick them up from school before you drop them off at their other parent’s house. You’ll get the time in the ride, and you’ll build a positive rapport with your ex.
Always be open to change in logistics
As your children grow up, circumstances will change. Your custody arrangement may need augmentation along the way, and you will need to be up for working it all out with your ex. It may initially be an irritation, but working together is what is best for everyone involved.
Learn to work with and communicate with your ex
Even if you absolutely loathe your ex, you still have to find a way to manage the children together. You don’t have to be friends to successfully co-parent.
Reframe the situation in your mind, and think of it as business correspondence. You likely have colleagues at work that you don’t really like, but you have to work alongside that person.
Remain cordial even when your ex starts dating again
When the time comes that your ex begins to date again, you have to manage your emotions with grace. You may feel sad, abandoned, rejected, or just plain angry, but your kids come first. Place your emotions to the side, and be opened to building a cordial relationship with your ex’s new partner.